Vanity Schmanity Plates

On the first day of school, one of my professors was trying to illustrate how and why we communicate. He used cars as an example. We use turn signals to let other people know our intentions. Some people use bumper or window stickers to say something about themselves. Like, I have a family! Here is a stick-figure approximation of them in birth order! Or, Stick figure families are silly, here’s a T-Rex eating yours! I’m very funny!

People do this, he said, to humanize their machines. To communicate: this is not just a heap of earth-killing metal and gas, I’m in here, too, and I have a personality! Hopes! Dreams! People smaller than I am who depend on me!

Other drivers use license plate frames to similar effect. Then there are those who take their comms to the next level, with the license plate itself.

In most states, drivers can pay extra to have their plate say whatever they want, within reason. In California, a personalized plate costs $103 (vs $50 for a regular plate), and $83 per year to renew (vs $40), and the DMV says you CANNOT choose the number “69” because it is “reserved only for 1969 year model vehicles that the license plates will be placed upon,” you sicko.

These plates are considered “special interest” plates, and the extra fees help fund things like coastal conservation, museum funding, and breast cancer awareness.

Because of this, any CA vanity plate is, technically, worth it. But we’re not here to be thoughtful. We’re here to make the kind of petty, snap judgements we’d make if we briefly saw these plates in traffic. Was it worth the extra cash for what these drivers have to say?

It’s time to play WAS IT WORTH IT?

Here we go!